this article switches between first, second and third-person in ways that feel jarring at times, and not in the manner i feel like you intended.
The walls, despite lacking eyes, can see wanderers' every move. With every passing second, our confines inch closer, filling in the empty space. […] Wanderers, completely isolated, are left to their own devices.
Don't [you] anticipate having a sense of navigation, though; it's likely that wanderers will lose all of it in due time.
i don't see the purpose of switching around perspectives this often when there aren't any points of contrast or split between the different povs.
[…] they are the entrances to a realm filled with nothing but a chaotic, unknown void of forgetfulness.
expressions like these are too abstract for me to imagine anything terrifying; they sound almost cookie-cutter. the excessive use of [adjective noun of optional adjective] throughout the article can quickly get repetitive on the eyes, and funnily enough, the portion about the mouse-hawk simile was the only line i liked about the page because it felt fresh.
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