Apologies for taking a while to respond to this as I was occupied with a number of things. Pointing out specifics:
- General prose + repetition
- Some stuff could be cut
- I'm just gonna do both of these at once since they're line-by-line
Level 3’s hallways consist of brick walls, the color of which are inconsistent, that surround dusty, concrete flooring and dim fluorescent lights on the ceiling. The infamous hum-buzz that radiates throughout Level 0 is also present here, though much less apparent.
Don't need to know about brick wall colour or that Level 3 shares specifically Level 0's hum-buzz.
Given the fact that most expeditions into Level 3 are done with the intention of resource collection rather than general research — and the generally dangerous conditions of Level 3 as a whole making such expeditions both expensive and difficult — [cont]
Repeats the first paragraph with an unnecessary amount of words.
[cont] this initial expedition was paramount to providing The M.E.G. with several of the images and fundamental qualities regarding the level. To this day, a large portion of the data regarding the level’s environment and general layout comes from this initial exploration.
These don't need to be two separate clauses.
As mentioned earlier, exploration of Level 3 is extremely difficult, expensive, and often impractical, which is why remarkably few major research expeditions have occurred since Team Overseer’s initial exploration.
Again, unnecessary repetition. Intro sentence to this paragraph can instead be a brief opening statement on the level's architecture since that's the topic of the paragraph.
This method has been put on indefinite hold for the time being due to the expense of drone technology and fruitless results of the previous attempts.
This doesn't need to be stated/it's kind of implied already.
Wanderers and researchers alike have frequently reported seeing a shadowy figure moving or running in the distance. Others often report a looming sense of dread or anxiety when staring at the areas behind the bars for too long. Some have even outright said that they felt like they were being watched. One wanderer even reported a faint sound of crying, just barely audible over the sounds of the machinery.
I feel like this can be delivered in a more condensed fashion with a colon and semicolons format to do away with the vague and unimportant info of who heard or felt the thing.
Due to the inability to explore these areas through current means, no official conclusion has been reached connecting all these instances or confirming any hypotheses.
This info is implied and needs not be stated.
Through the very limited data collected through the short drone videos before disconnection, a few other notable anomalies have been observed. These include the discovery of Object 56, strange paintings and murals, frantic diary entries on worn notebook paper, skulls of various entities found on Level 3, large pools of the black sludge from inside of the pipes, miscellaneous train parts, and Greek-style sculptures of an unidentified woman — many of which are heavily worn, damaged, or weathered. Some of these anomalies will be elaborated on later.
Since this is all elaborated on later, this paragraph can be cut and/or replaced with a singular statement that specific anomalies of note will be elaborated later on.
Attempts have consisted of the usage of chainsaws, explosives, acid, the black sludge in the pipes, Squirt Guns filled with lava, Clumpshots, and Black Bottled Lightning, but none of these experiments have so much as scratched them.
[…]
The metal has proven to be non-magnetic, which has eliminated any potential for using powerful magnets to force the bars to bend.
[…]
The bars have even proven to be impenetrable to non-material substances like x-ray radiation — discovered when scientists attempted to use x-ray fluorescence to non-destructively determine the molecular composition of the bars.
I know info like this is meant to drive home the anomalousness and how crazy it is but this can really just be replaced with something along the lines of "Despite all attempts, they are completely indestructible."
Coming into contact with the liquid and even tampering with the pipes is highly ill-advised.
Obvious statement.
Attempts to study the makeup of the sludge have yielded very peculiar results, as the substance does not appear to resemble anything that can be found on Earth. The atom-like molecular structures that make up the liquid do not resemble standard subatomic particles in material terrestrial substances and contain wildly different structures upon further examination. Typical structures like protons, neutrons, and electrons seem entirely absent, and attempts to document and better understand this sludge are ongoing.
I feel that everything past the first sentence in this is redundant here. It also brings unnecessary attention to the idea that the MEG is capable of examining subatomic particles or at least bothered to do so for one of likely many strange and unexplainable substances that exist across the Backrooms.
This inscription, while fascinating, is unique to only one of the instances, and it is unknown whether this was planted by a malicious party to lead researchers astray or points to the origin of this process. Further research is necessary, but many have postulated that this inscription is accurate and implies that Purpification is the result of an unknown creature on Level 3. Many, however, also assert this is probably a hoax from an enemy group or random wanderer. Further research is needed to make any certain conclusions.
This paragraph can be shortened to a singular sentence about how "we don't know" or even cut out entirely and merged with the preceding paragraph (as in the desc not the note).
The most detailed explanation from a wanderer who had heard this inexplicable sound was that it was “the embodiment of hell itself,” which was the most she was willing to give.
I think this is an overelaboration that veers away from the "scary" territory that you were probably going for.
Whatever the source of the auditory hallucinations is appears to be selective against people who are trying to document it.
Also feels like an overelaboration/too specific of a statement that it kind of kills the intrigue.
Most average wanderers know about this phenomenon and view Level 3 as the best way to acquire resources en masse.
First half is unimportant info and the second half is another repetition of this point
This is what I was mostly referring to with the "hamfisted" Icarus stuff. I feel like there's a lot of stuff here that's specifically trying to allude to this being Icarus especially with the speculatory nature of a lot of sentences, especially since we've already been told about sanctums and scopophobia and purpification and like we already know that a lot of Icarus stuff is going on here. Imo some of this section could be trimmed for brevity but also to make us actually
wonder if stuff like the art and cookbook is from Icarus yknow?
As a result, no one is allowed to enter without a security guard pricking their finger to ensure their blood is red. No exceptions are ever made, including people of high influence like the Oversight Council.
This is also talked about later and in more detail in the Base Gamma section so this is kind of repetitive.
Okay it's getting late for me lol I'm gonna stop here. Hopefully this helps.
